Frau Summer

As summer comes to a close, I wanted to look back at a trend I started to see on my Twitter feed in early June. Well, not a trend exactly but a particular term, used in a way I had never seen it used before. It first appeared as a heading on moodboard-like tweets, images of beautiful women with braided hair, lace curtains, Anaïs Nin quotes, young Laetitia Casta, cotton dresses, fresh fruit, Jane and Serge holding baby Charlotte, a monk petting a cat in the garden, etc. It was “frau summer”. I wasn't quite sure what “Frau'' meant, but I knew that I liked it. In the words of @sourhoestarter, “i rly fuck w these frau girls…i see the vision.” There seemed to be particular emphasis on poetry and sun exposure. I saw tweets about the “waif to frau pipeline,” and Maya (@bukowskiasagirl) declared the Frau to be the “healed waif”. Frau seemed to originate from a need to describe a post-waif existence online, something that can be very difficult to imagine for girls and young women that grew up in the trenches of 2010’s Tumblr. At this point, colloquial terms like “waif” and “coquette” are starting to feel a bit memed to death, to the point that guys are referencing the terms in their Hinge bios and girls are putting pink ribbons on toast. Moreover, it has been increasingly impossible for young women to envision themselves online as anything beyond a stagnated image of a girl. To quote one of Delude’s founders, “Girls/young women cling onto their girlhood because ‘womanhood’ feels impossible in the age of the internet.”

Frau seemed to offer a glimmer of the future, an elegant shift into online womanhood, without sacrificing aesthetic desires. Though the word itself comes from the German word “Fräulein” or a “young unmarried woman”, the inventors of the term appeared to be defining something outside of the realm of marriage and men, a sort of traditionalism that rejects the mere political for the romantic and sensual. The Frau embraces evolution. Upon further inquiry, I found that the movement was started collectively by twitter users @bukowskiasagirl, @girlfromatlas, @yevgenyonegin, @hibachisoup, @ourhyperballad, @figfleur, @realsnowhite and @sokurovark. I wanted to go directly to the source, so I decided to slide into the DMs of Frau’s creators and adopters and find out how the vision originated.

JJ: I’ve seen “Frau” defined as the “healed waif”, and I was wondering if there is anything you would want to add to that definition.

@bukowskiasagirl: The origin of our 'Frau' corner of the Internet is as follows: We are a group of girls who met on Twitter and have since become close friends. What originally bonded us was what was then known as 'waiftwt'. Many of us had struggled with eating disorders and then individually found our way to recovery. When we had fully cut ties with 'waifs', we wanted to create a new sort of 'movement' that would attract women who were or strived to be at the stage we had reached in newfound mental peace.

@girlfromatlas: The Waif was a melancholic state in which quite a few people were in a while back which we are striving away from. The Frau is gentle with herself, she does not shy away from a quick bite of happiness.

@yevgenyonegin: The most important part is that the Frau or Fräulein is a healed woman, she has, in the words of Lana, “let the light in”. I don’t know if anyone remembers waifism/waiftwt, but the Frau can be seen as a grown up Waif, she’s mature. Waifs suffer from a kind of melancholy that the Fräulein is striving [to get] away from.

@sokurovark: Frau is inner peace and comfortability in yourself and others around you. Taking care of yourself whether that be nourishing your body, self-care, cutting off unneeded people, etc. The complete opposite of self-destruction that can be associated with waif [culture].

@figfleur: I think the idea of the Waif comes from this idea that being sad is romantic, there is a glorification of eating disorders and depression. To me, it's really similar to the Tumblr 'sad girl' from the 2010s, which I am old enough to remember vividly. If the Waif is a romanticization of our emotional plights and mental illness, then Frau is the celebration of health and life. It feels more optimistic and sustainable than waif.

JJ: What defines “Frau” as a movement, beyond aesthetics?

@bukowskiasagirl: The word 'Frau' means woman in German. We felt that it encapsulated the rite of passage from struggling Waif to a healed woman, so to speak. The aesthetic component was additionally important to us, of course, as we are all in different ways engaged in the arts. Unfortunately, this [aesthetic] component naturally became overarching and caused some confusion since it resembled other corners of the internet one may be familiar with. I imagine it has become clear how our movement differs ideologically.

@girlfromatlas: The mindset. Discarding every mournful thought of girlhood and looking forward to womanhood with excitement. Aging is beautiful, and we appreciate every moment life has to offer. Life doesn't have to be viewed through a miserable glass, you can find beauty in everything.

@yevgenyonegin: Fräulein certainly has an aesthetic behind it that we’ve created but it goes beyond aesthetics, she eats whole foods, wears natural fibers, she’s gentle with herself, she appreciates the beauty of the natural world, she comes from all walks of life. She is a fiercely independent woman, which is why we’ve decided to reclaim the term “Fräulein” for this movement, even though the word is seen in modern times as being derogatory. The Frau depends on no one for her confidence and happiness but she’s not cold; she loves the people and the world around her. Fräulein subculture is about coming back to your roots, healing your inner child, loving your family and friends, nourishing yourself physically, mentally, intellectually.

@figfleur: The Frau aesthetic is basically the same as Coquette, Waif, or Sad Girl but its attitude is different. It's a way to feel joy towards life and growing up. Eating well, being kind towards others, taking care of one's mental health, being more independent, looking forward towards working or motherhood, etc. at the end of the day it's all just for fun, but it can help to pull girls out of their Sad Girl/Waif phase.

JJ: How is the Frau different from the Tradwife?

@girlfromatlas: I would say it's different in nearly every way. The Frau has goals she aspires to reach; She doesn't oppose marriage and children, but she is after her own desires first and does not wish to be tied down without living out her full potential first.

@yevgenyonegin: I think the Frau is completely at odds with the Tradwife. Tradwife subculture is conservative, it’s oppressive for women. Fräuleins are feminists, we want women to be liberated from their dependence on men. It’s a female separatist movement in a way, the Frau movement has nothing to do with men, it’s all about women looking internally to find their genuine happiness.

@sokurovark: Frau is nowhere near Tradwife as it’s based on the love for different ethnicities and cultures. Of course it comes from the real definition of the [German] word “unmarried woman”, but the end goal isn’t to be married with a husband and to serve him. Do whatever you are comfortable with. Tradwives tend to be unwelcoming with racist roots, which is farthest from what we want Frau to be. Frau is the love for the Middle East, Caribbean, Europe, Africa, Asia, you name it. Every background is of value.

@figfleur: My interpretation of Frau is a young, unmarried woman. She's independent and more youthful. As opposed to the Tradwife who is mainly a wife and mother, and is less independent because she has a husband. I think the word “trad” also carries with it a somewhat negative connotation because of its association with tradcaths and right-wing politics. Frau is apolitical, in my view. Also, it isn't something that has been co-opted by men (yet) like we've seen with the Tradwife.

*via* *@girlfromatlas* & *@yevgenyonegin* on X

JJ: I’ve seen a lot of imagery of Jane Birkin in relation to Frau vibes. What makes Jane Frau? Who are some other Frau icons?

@bukowskiasagirl: The late Jane Birkin has always held a significant influence on me personally, as she inspired not only my mother, but also my mother’s mother. She once eloquently said:

"In the old days, I used to think: 'Oh, never be satisfied, never admit to being happy.' But there's no curse in being happy."

To me, this encapsulates the essence of our ideology and my individual journey recently. I've painfully learned that embracing happiness entails leaving behind the familiar but suffocating blanket of sadness. Lana Del Rey's music, particularly her latest album 'Did You Know That There's a Tunnel Under Ocean Blvd,' further encapsulates this journey, one I believe many women traverse.

@girlfromatlas: It's easy to be drawn to Jane Birkin's carefree and wild spirit. She was a widely optimistic woman who embraced the beauty of life and aging. A Frau icon would simply be whoever inspires you to live a better, beautiful, and more exciting life.

@yevgenyonegin: Jane Birkin is definitely a Frau because of her perspective on beauty and aging. Jane appreciates all aspects of human life, she never worried herself with anti-aging, heavy makeup, peacocking. She embodies a simplicity that is very prominent in the Frau movement. More Frau icons for me personally are Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy, another woman who loved the simple things, Audrey Hepburn, who was down to earth and warm, Princess Diana, independent, broke boundaries, Sade, inspiring, loving, artistic. There’s many women who represent the Fräulein mindset.

@sokurovark: Jane was incredibly well spoken, carefree, put together, and charming. It’s natural to be drawn to women like her. Frau icons for me personally are Jasmine Tookes, Marpessa Dawn, Donna Summer, Ertha Kitt, Shelley Duvall, Tina Kunakey, Dakota Johnson, etc.

@figfleur: I think Jane Birkin has a look that is both youthful and grown up, it appeals to young women just transitioning into womanhood, playful, yet mature. Other icons for me are Laetitia Casta and Brigitte Bardot, although I think Birkin is still probably the best representation. I guess the French woman aesthetic is central to Frau, for whatever reason.

JJ: What does a Frau eat for breakfast?

@bukowskiasagirl: Whatever she feels like will still her hunger that particular morning.

@girlfromatlas: Whatever nourishes her and gives her energy to take on the day. There is no diet besides being good to your body and enjoying the growth of womanhood.

@yevgenyonegin: There’s no specific diet that a Fräulein should adhere to. In general, just be good to yourself. We all eat different things, but for me personally, I’m a big fan of hard boiled eggs and whatever fruits and vegetables I can get my hands on, bread with “toothbutter” (butter spread so thickly it reveals teeth marks upon biting), always a coffee with lots of whole milk. I’m also a fan of more culture specific foods. I like kasha, which is a slavic porridge made the Slovak way, and also slíže, which is a sweet, sugary egg noodle dish with nuts and butter.

@figfleur: A typical frau breakfast includes fresh seasonal fruit, good bread with lots of butter, and coffee with cream. She doesn't shy away from high calorie and nourishing foods.

@sokurovark: Fräu eats whatever gives her energy and nourishment. There’s no rules.

JJ: How does a Frau spend her summer?

@bukowskiasagirl: Personally, this summer was filled with numerous revelations. I delved deeply into my relationships, emotions, and personal history, trying to make sense of the myriad threads weaving through them. The most important realization, however, was the significance of empathy and forgiveness, as well as the need to invest time in comprehending the perspectives of those who hold affection for you and those whom you hold dear.

@girlfromatlas: By traveling and spending as much time as she can outside. Sun exposure is important to fight summer depression.

@yevgenyonegin: I spent my summer in white linen dresses sunbathing, swimming, on the trampoline with my younger siblings. Gardening, eating mangoes while tanning, buying farmer’s market fresh peaches.

@sokurovark: A frau spends her summers outside with people, nature, and animals. Going fruit picking, inviting the girls for a picnic, reading, connecting with her culture and what makes her who she is.

@figfleur: She spent her summer lounging in the garden or by the beach, reading Bukowski or Nabokov or Anaïs Nin. Picking fresh fruits. eating pasta and drinking wine at restaurants, sunbathing. Working in the garden or maybe on a farm. An equal balance between work and play....

Special thanks to @girlfromatlas, @yevgenyonegin, @hibachisoup, @bukowskiasagirl, @ourhyperballad, @sokurovark, @figfleur & @reaIsnowhite. <3

Juliette Jeffers is an essayist, poet, and columnist for Delude Magazine.

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